As I mentioned in my post from yesterday, we got to play musical bedrooms over the weekend with the goal of creating a nursery for the baby. This required moving Miss E, who is almost 22 months, out of the crib. Believe me, if it wasn’t necessary, I’d just leave her there until Kindergarten!
Because of the spacing of our children, this isn’t the first time we’ve had to make the transition to a bed at a fairly early age. With a lot of luck and a little technique, it doesn’t have to be a nightmare for anybody!
(Disclaimer: I’m not a fan of the family bed, though I know there are many families that it works well for. My tips are primarily for transitioning a toddler used to sleeping through the night in a crib. I’m sure some of these things can apply to a family bed situation as well!)
Here are my tips for making the transition go smoothly:
1. Talk to your toddler about it. Just because they aren’t totally verbal doesn’t mean they don’t understand you.
After we moved the beds on Saturday, I spent time with Miss E in her new room. We talked about where everyone would sleep and where her new bed was.
2. Make the switch WITH your toddler. Have them take their blankets, pillows etc. from the crib and place them on the bed. This helps them to be excited and they aren’t surprised to find their things no longer in the crib.
3. Set your expectations of what will happen at bedtime appropriately. Expect to spend a few nights putting your toddler back to bed quite a few times. Plan for it. Get cozy in the hallway with a book if you have to.
4. Keep bedtime routines in place. The only thing that should change is where your toddler is sleeping! This helps to minimize the stress your toddler will feel at the change.
5. After the usual bedtime routine, place child in the bed and explain again that this is where he/she will be sleeping. Hugs, kisses and off you go.
6. The first time they escape (unless you have a miracle child, there WILL be a first time), take your child back to bed, explain firmly that they are to stay in bed and exit.
7. Don’t say a word, simply place them back to bed. It may seem like they have escaped four billion times, but hang in there! Actions speak louder than words! Don’t be lovey dovey, no meaningful eye contact, just zip those lips and back to bed they go!
For Miss E, this process took 45 minutes the first night. I holed up in the hallway with my book and put her back over and over. When I finally went downstairs, she was still awake, but staying in bed!
8. Nap-time is the same. Nothing different. I don’t recommend allowing them to sleep in a crib during nap-time for long after making the switch. Believe me, I get how important nap-time is, but I think it confuses the child.
I allowed Miss E to sleep in her crib the first day only. She was over-tired and so was I. But I am happy to report that she has taken a couple of good naps on her bed!
9. Have patience! This goes back to expectations. Whenever making the transition, I always expect to be a little sleep deprived the first week. But it doesn’t take them long if you are consistent!! Which leads me to #10!
10. Be consistent! Don’t give in to whines or cries or pleadings. Everyone will be happier in the end!
11. Finally, night time wakings. Don’t give in to the urge to allow them to crawl into bed with you! They may awaken and realize they can escape and come find you. Wake your sleepy head up and put them back to bed. Depending on the child, you may have to do this a few times before they get the drift. But calm heads and persistence will once again prevail!
Miss E found me at 5:30 a.m. this morning. At my house, that is the middle of the night, so it was back to bed for her! She didn’t come find me again until 7:30 a.m.
In my personal opinion, it is worth the hassle and the temporary sleep deprivation to transition successfully to the bed. Bedtime at our house has never been a major ordeal (knock on all the wood you can locate), with the occasional exception, because we are always consistent. For me, I desperately need that time to recuperate and have some grown-up down time. I love my kids, but I don’t want to love them all night long!
What are your successes or failures with bedtime or the big transition? Do you have methods that work?
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I love the picture of all four of them in their beds. It looks like a lot of fun to me! I love the tip about moving their bed WITH them. I had never thought about having them move their pillows and blankets to their new bed. It makes a lot of sense. Great tips!
We just turn the turn knob around so we can lock their door from the outside. When the child is asleep we unlock. Of course that wouldn’t work if we had our big kids in with our little kids.
Diane Robertson´s last [type] ..The United Families International Myth Buster Monday
The timing of this is perfect, as we are preparing to transition our 26 month old from her crib to a regular bed. We do have one advantage, a dutch door on her bedroom that locks from the outside. LOL She won’t be coming to find me @ 5:30 AM. LOL
Great advice! Thank you for posting this!
Look at those sisters! I shared a room with my sister growing up, and I have such fond memories. Love this feature…glad you decided to do it!
Amy´s last [type] ..Am I Ready
We’ve only transitioned 1 kid, and she never once got out of bed.
BUT…
She was over 3 when we did.
liz´s last [type] ..Losing Your Mojo
We waited to move our daughter until she asked for a bed, so we had two kids in cribs for a while. She asked for a bed for her 3rd birthday and that’s what she got! At 4, she still waits for me to come get her in the morning!!! If you can do it, wait until they say they’re ready. It makes a big difference!
My son crawled out of a crib at 15 months. We moved him shortly thereafter, and it was the best thing we’ve ever done for our sleep. He wiggled so much in his crib and would hit his head and wake up crying. In the twin, he has so much room to move. I think toddler beds are ridiculous (a lesson I learned the expensive way). I laid silently on the floor the first several nights and put him back in his bed every time he got out. Now, over a year later, he rarely gets out of his bed, even in the morning and still waits for us to come get him. Also, we moved him to a different side of the house, and black out curtains solved our nap time issues.
Looks like the transition went really well. Everyone looks so happy!
Our first son decided to crawl IN his crib one day and it was only a few minutes later that he showed us he can crawl out too! LOL We have one of those convertible cribs so I remember my heart racing as we took the front of it off and added the bed rail to keep him in. He took to it pretty quickly but we had to do some of the exact same things on your list.
Great tips you have there too. Really brought back some memories!
Apryl´s last [type] ..Wordless Wednesday- Rhyme Time
Mack got the boot from the crib just before two and it was quite a job the first few nights. I did exactly what you’re talking about. I was big pregnant and exhausted, but after a couple of nights of hanging out in the hall, it was like he’d been there forever.
Your girl’s room looks like a good time! I bet she’s feeling like such a big girl!
I love your “ways to avoid Armageddon” slogan! Very funny and very true!